


The Language of Flowers

by Veynn



Category: Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure (Cartoon), Tangled (2010)
Genre: Gen, Nothing says revenge more than the language of flowers, Varian is still angry towards the King but who can blame him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:55:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24379837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Veynn/pseuds/Veynn
Summary: Varian may have reached an agreement with the king, but he does not have to like him. Quite frankly, he finds everything the king stands for to be deplorable. As he is Rapunzel's father, Varian will refrain from seeking revenge. But that does not mean the alchemist can't get the final word before he leaves Corona.
Comments: 19
Kudos: 100





	The Language of Flowers

**Author's Note:**

> It was only a matter of time before I wrote a fic about Varian insulting the king by 'gifting' him with flowers. I...I just like flowers a lot.

“I need you to sell me the most terrible bouquet of flowers, one that will spell out complete loathing and contempt towards my enemies,” Varian states, the perfect image of innocence as he smiles at the flower seller. “Something that will be the most passive aggressive way to say ‘fuck you’ and _not_ get me hanged on the spot.”

“So…no funeral flowers?” she asks, rolling her eyes.

“Right, nothing for funerals or something that could get me indicted for a crime.” Originally, Varian had meant to send funerary flowers, but…that could certainly be construed as a threat against the crown. He had thought of the idea on a whim. Revenge was sweet, sure, but…he’d rather not do anything severe.

While Varian had made amends with Rapunzel and is on decent terms with most of the royal family, it is not a correct assumption to say that he may hold a bit of a grudge against the king. Varian had not intended to pull this little prank, but looking back, it was more than due. It was not merely the king’s actions against him that had incurred his perpetual wrath and contempt. Thanks in-part due to the inactions of his royal travesty, King Frederic, the entirety of Corona was nearly overrun by the black rocks. And that is not even getting into the matters of how he had found out, years later, Rapunzel had been freed from one tower only to be thrown into _another_ tower. He does not like to recall much of what happened from _that_ year, but the alchemist knows he had a part in that. Still, it does not excuse Frederic from his actions.

The king had gone too complacent in this moment of peace. Afterall, everything is as it should be. No more threats, Saporians, tiny blueberry demons, deathly sharp black rocks, crazy blue-haired rock ladies, and most of all—no more of his ‘alchemy’. At least, that is what they had all been led to believe. His role as the royal engineer was cushy and safe...but there was no adventure or life to be had with being trapped. Certainly, he had been happy with his role for the first few months, to have been accepted by Corona. He felt as if he had finally found a purpose in his life, but the castle was stifling…too constricting. Now, he can see that this job…it was not for him, nor for his benefit. In the end, he was the last problem to be fixed, the only remaining piece that could not fit into the puzzle.

Corona merely wanted him to play his part at the expense of who he truly is, but _not_ anymore. In just a mere few hours, the kingdom will have to make do without their royal engineer. He’ll finally be off, away from this kingdom and following in the footsteps of his mother. It is bittersweet to leave the land he had called home, but Varian can tell he is not wanted. At least, he knows the kingdom does not want ‘him’, but rather, the person they expect him to be.

He’ll be gone, but it does not mean he can’t have a little fun at the king’s expense in the process.

“Will these do?” The sales woman drawls in a dispassionate tone as she points her finger at…what could quite possibly be the most garish flowers Varian had ever seen. All an outrageous shade of hot pink, they honestly seem like the type of flower Rapunzel would be into. “Only that one shoemaker buys them.”

“What flowers are they? And what do they symbolize?” Varian asks, walking up to the pink flowers and plucking a few of them from the vase. 

“Peonies,” she automatically responds, placing a hand on her cheek as she leans her elbow on the table. “They’re as passive-aggressive as you can get with flowers. You must really hate whoever it is you’re giving them to—”

“Perfect.” Varian grins, picking up the vase and placing it on the counter, water nearly sloshing out of the vase in the process. “I’ll take them all. Do you have anything else?”

“Not that I care,” she blandly mutters, “But how are you going to pay for all of these?”

“Don’t worry,” the alchemist chuckles…it…honestly does nothing to convince the clerk. Having the title of royal engineer practically thrust upon the alchemist as a method of placating had been underwhelming, but the title certainly did have a few perks. _There’s no price too high for revenge._

\---

All-in-all, Varian would call that little excursion of his a complete success. He may be stuck hauling quite a few [heavy] vases of flowers into the wagon, but the outcome would be more than worth the effort. In the end, vengeance would be reaped, and the king would be none the wiser. Varian wanted black roses; as dark and unfathomable as his complete and utter contempt for _Frederic_ , but, well…the clerk merely rolled her eyes and insinuated his plans were pretentious.

Nothing would say ‘screw you’ more than a flower that proclaims the king is dead to him. Oh well…at least he had still completed the bouquet he had set out for. Unfortunately, the sun was still bright, which meant he had to hold off on his plans until nightfall. Luckily for him [and perhaps not so lucky for the king], Varian had his own place in the castle. He could come and go as he so wished, so…these flowers will just stay in his lab; buried underneath the castle. Afterall, besides his dad and Ruddiger, the only person who ever stopped by was Rapunzel.

The King wouldn’t know what hit him. 

Besides the peonies, he had also opted for orange lilies and tansy. Nothing said ‘I hate you’ more than wishing for him to get decked in the face or mauled by a bear. Beautiful.

Varian knew his plan may be a bit ridiculous and a tiny bit petty, but it was _so_ unlike him that he just had to try it. If the kingdom wanted him to be a different person, than by the Sun he was going to grant this one last request for them. He did live in a farming village, as well, so there was some irony to be had. Nonetheless, as long as it irked the king, his job was done.

“Hey buddy,” Varian says as Ruddiger hops onto the cart. The raccoon chitters, tilting its head in confusion and moving a paw towards a bright orange petal. “No, they’re not for you, but we’ll stop for an apple on the way to the castle.”

Consoled, the raccoon plops down in-between two of the vases, large eyes staring expectantly at the alchemist.

He could laugh, really—Varian was one step closer to his goal, but…he can’t risk fueling anymore gossip about his so-called ‘mad scientist’ status. Or the other rumors of how he was the princess’s feral wizard brother who lurked beneath the castle, waiting for the perfect moment to strike……

_Actually, that last rumor was not entirely off the mark._

Shaking the intrusive thoughts out of his head, the alchemist sets his sights on the castle, grandiose in scale and bathed in the light of a warm spring day, for what he is sure will be the last time for a long while. Soon, he will be gone, and a new chapter of his life will commence.

At least, it will be, once he reaps vengeance against those who wronged him.

\---

In the end, his plan worked without a hitch. Varian had snuck the flowers onto the king’s throne overnight, and no one had been the wiser. Of course, he and Ruddiger had stuck around the following morning—what good was it to pretty much insult the king and not be around to see the aftermath? While Varian is sure he wouldn’t understand the meaning behind the bouquet, he is certain Rapunzel will be there to fill in the gaps.

A gasp immediately follows as the princess places her hands over her mouth, tears threatening to spill down her face as her shoulders shake.

The king looks towards her, alarmed, while Queen Arianna merely looks amused. Her lips are quirked in a half-smile, green eyes lit up as she says, “What’s the matter, Rapunzel?”

“I—” The princess’s eyes trail towards Varian. He may technically be welcomed in the castle, but it is a rare sight to see him in the throne room. Though, since he is leaving, Rapunzel had insisted he visit them on the way out.

_Ah, it seems she has realized just who the bouquet of flowers came from._

“It’s nothing, mom,” Rapunzel laughs, wiping tears from her eyes. Still confused as ever, the king furrows his brows, looking from the princess to the queen…until his gaze falls on Varian.

_“You—”_

Biting back a smile, Rapunzel tries to restrain the king. Queen Arianna merely says, “Thank you for not giving him monkshood.”

“I think it’s time you leave,” the princess says, apologetically. There is no harshness in her voice as she says again, perhaps too lightly, “It’s best if you go now, Varian. Dad’s not looking too happy right now.”

“Alright, Rapunzel,” Varian says, bowing dramatically and tipping an invisible hat at the princess before giving a polite, respectful wave of farewell at the queen.

As for the king, Ruddiger merely sticks a tongue out at him, clearly sharing the same sentiments as the alchemist.

“Oh, and don’t forget to write me letters!”

“Will do, princess,” Varian says, whistling a bit too loudly as he knows it would drive the king insane. As he makes his way towards the exit, with Nigel sneering at him, the alchemist turns around—

“You can’t charge me for anything, dad,” the alchemist _knows_ this could potentially get him killed, but he is certain Rapunzel won’t let this happen. “I have impartial immunity. Cassandra was let off the hook, so all I have left to say is—”

_I can’t tell the king to fuck off no matter how much I hate him._

“I hope you like flowers!”

Ah, yes—

It’s best he takes his leave before the king sends the royal guard after him. Again.

**Author's Note:**

> I never cared for King Frederic's character, but after reading quite a few fics, I have decided that...I really do not like the guy. Anyway, I doubt Varian would actually opt for insulting his enemies through plants, but that is something I have considered many, many times.....give me back my mail, Karen.
> 
> It's petty, sure, but hey, it beats reconstructing ancient automatons. It's less effort, too.


End file.
